Introducing the MARAs

Did you catch Toro's Benjamin Briggs on the cover of the National Post's Toronto section on Saturday February 18 (The Worthy 30 - They're Smart, handsome, talented - and unattached")? Inside we discover that Briggs is 29, Gemini, eats Marmite on toast for breakfast, always carries a hanky and drives a BMW (with a Vespa on the side).

Which brings me to my thought du jour - it seems that every corner of this industry has it's awards - NMAs for editorial, MIAs for media planning, ACEs for circulation excellence. Why nothing for the reps? Sure most people are under the impression that we are dumb and lazy yet still are rewarded with obscene compensation packages and fat expense accounts. But that doesn't mean our fragile egos don't need a gentle stroking every so often. Something to emotionally counterbalance all the humiliations, degradations and rejections that are our daily existence. So let's create the MARAs (Magazine Advertising Rep Awards).

Judging can be done by panels drawn from the ad agency community. Categories can include best dressed (Benjamin Briggs), most handsome (Benjamin Briggs again), most entertaining presenter, most persistent, most honest, least honest, best golfer, best lunch and of course - Reptile of the year!

Missed another one

Your weather-averse lizard missed yet another party, this time because of the freezing rain. And I hear it was a pretty good one. But how can you lose with free booze, free food and free coat check. I'm told that there were attractive young women in spandex body suits walking through the crowd making the ladies feel a little old and out of shape and the men feeling a lot old and in no shape. And there were many freelancers and consultants (aka: formerly employed people) looking for their next gig. Oh yeah and lots of magazine ad creative from around the world. But the lousy weather might have scared away a few people other than yours truly as the big room that is Koolhaus was apparently quite, well… roomy.

I'm also told that nobody was seen drinking a Keith's (Those who like children, can like them too much). Perverted actors - one more reason for print.

Anybody who was there and wants to tell me more, feel free to comment.

Don't you just hate it when they yawn

An advertising sales presentation might not be as entertaining as a date with Jim Carrey but that's no excuse for yawning with abandon in group meeting. Maybe I shouldn't take it too personally as it was just one person and I can't remember the last time I had a narcoleptic in the crowd.

If you are a media planner and a rep is boring you to tears (or maybe you're so hung over that even a pole dance by Pamela Anderson would bore you to tears), might I suggest a simple solution - ask a question or two. A little participation, much like the traditional 7th inning stretch, might snap you from your stupor and get you back in the game. Then again, why not use the opportunity to catch a few z's; it's just another rep going blah, blah, blah.

The fat lady has sung for Dr. Karl Moore

Dr. Moore, I had you all wrong. Seems I mistook you for a highbrow academic who had never sold a thing in his life (other than the good people at Marketing on your life-of-a-sales-call trilogy). But buried in the grand finale is the telling comment: "A mistake I often made early in my sales career was to interrupt a customer early in their question". So with a couple of mouse clicks , I discover that prior to joining academia, Dr. Moore worked 12 years in sales and marketing management positions with IBM, Bull and Hitachi. I seriously wonder how many weeks were actually in sales.

Despite his pedigree, this Dr. Moore has managed to produce a totally lame paint-by-numbers series on selling. In this final instalment, "It ain't over 'til it's over" we are told that we should appreciate buyer objections and should respond to them. (Personally, I like to respond by crying profusely in the hope of generating a sympathy sale -- I call this technique the "wail close". Really quite effective.). He then suggests we close by asking for the sale. Apparently they expect us to do that the same way you expect to be asked to remove your shirt by your physician. Dr. Moore does not tell us whether to say "pretty please with a cherry on top" or when to negotiate or how we could add value to the buy with some customized proposals… In fact he tells us nothing of any interest or value. But he does slyly suggest that, because once the sale is made the buyer will likely feel suckered in by our newly-slick approach ("buyer blues" he calls it), we should take them to lunch and reassure them that it's all going to be okay.

I'm going to miss him and his witty column.

Gag me Google

I've been ruminating a new business model for this business, one that would virtually eliminate the need for reps. Looks like Google is one giant step ahead of me. I paraphrase from todays MediaDailyNews:

Google has quietly launched a new phase of its offline media expansion strategy: a pilot test to gauge whether Google's online advertisers will bid for advertising space in major consumer magazines. During the test, advertisers can bid on Ellegirl, Martha Stewart Living, Motor Trend, Car and Driver, Budget Living, Entrepreneur, Women's Health & Fitness, PC World, Official Xbox Magazine, and InfoWorld.

The first ads will appear in April. The pilot is part of a Google's ambitious plan to provide advertisers with inventory beyond online search ads while helping the publishers themselves do better yield management.

It's not quite time to pack it in but the current system of selling print ads, virtually unchanged in over 100 years, is due for a technological overhaul and it's on the way.